If You Believe
by FarawayVisionary
Summary: Reality can become surreal when one peers beyond the veil of an otherwise mundane existence. Supernatural / Romance fic. DiegoxMOC.


_Ok! New story. The first chapter is just here to set the scene so there will be no canon characters yet I'm afraid. Be warned that this story is somewhat adult and may not be appropriate for younger readers. If you're not old enough for this you probably wouldn't like it that much anyway so don't feel left out. That's about all I have to say right now so I'll just jump right into the story._

_Disclaimer: I do not own any Blue Sky Studios characters that may be mentioned in future chapters of this story as they all belong to the aformentioned company._

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**Chapter 1: Crimson Regrets**

I ran myself a bath for the second time that day as I thought about the life I lived in that moment. Like the weather outside as the seasons changed to autumn, everything seemed a little more bleak than it had been in the seemingly recent past. I used to be a person of many hopes and dreams, someone who, as a child, thought they could accomplish great things in the coming years, that my success would continue unabated and that most of all, I'd be happy and free of cares once I had my independence. Even as a teenager when reality began to take its toll, I still held with me many wild fantasies about things I wanted and craved, like the attractive boy at my old high school, the same one who I later found would never love me the same way I would him. The same one that would in fact, taunt me in my darkest moments, to the point where I regressed sexually and held all of my romantic fantasies within myself, under a lock and key that no-one had yet inspired me to break, at least not yet, at least... not in this world.  
The bath continued to fill with warm water unsympathetically as I continued to think to myself in my home all alone about my personal regrets and failures, and what could have been, what should have been. I stared blankly out the window as the steam from the bath rose up and clouded my vision. I felt weak and hallucinogenic after several weeks of sleeping randomly and doing nothing but looking up a few sites on the net every now and again and listening to my favourite bands on my iPod in my room, while the world outside rained and shined with the passing of clouds. Once, the simplicity of nature would have captivated me but that time was alas, no more. The bath was almost full by now so I turned off both taps and took off my clothes, before gently putting my foot in the bath to test the temperature. It was fine, so I got into the bath completely and reclined back against the tiles behind my head. I closed my eyes.  
I just sat there for awhile with eyes shut as the humidity of the bathwater rose up and touched my face making beads of water condense on my skin. I experienced this as being annoying and itchy so I opened my eyes and sighed. I put my head down for a few seconds and had a dark thought just then, and I proceeded to get out of the bath and reach for the cupboard under the sink, where I pulled out a razor and got back into the bath again. I held the razor in my hand on examined it for a minute or so before I put it up against my face and began shaving. What was once presumed to be something dangerous and extreme ahead had become benign. It was like life after all the times I had catastrophised over supposed problems which turned out to be nothing big at all, but the feeling was always there, always waiting after every breath of relief, and eventually, the ill wind would blow by.  
I'd only shaved about half my face before I put the razor down and washed it in the bathwater surrounding me, the small thick hairs I'd just erased from my beard floating away from the razorblades where they rested to join the small sea. I ran my finger across the blade. I flinched slightly upon realisation that I had rubbed my finger the wrong way across the blade and had given myself a nasty cut. I put my finger underwater and let it bleed. I stared at the blood for a few moments as it ran out of my finger, my line of sight then moved to a series of scars on my right thigh. Where did I get those from? I wonder who was responsible?  
It was time to surrender once more. I moved the razorblade still held within my fingers and put it up to my right leg where I dragged it painfully across the skin, causing it to sever and leak with the liquid crimson manifestation of my ongoing depression. I did this a few times before putting the razor down on the floor next to the bath. I then placed my head back against the tiles and shut my eyes once more. This time I could rest without the beads of water running off my face and annoying me, not because they wouldn't be there, but because it didn't matter anymore. I was dead inside, long gone and yet still alive and in youth. My mind went blank as a dull pain from my harmed leg took over my senses. It was time to go for a walk once more, to run away like what would be impossible in reality, like I'd forgotten everything I now knew. It was time to take a journey to the past, even though as I reclined there wet and bleeding, I knew I wasn't going to be moving at all. The journey to be undertaken was to be all in my mind. There were a couple of pieces there that I still needed, and maybe, I could find a way out of this mess if I only knew how to use them.  
I felt the light behind my eyes pulsate and my body begin to shiver. The sensation was more powerful than normal and felt as though I was losing grip on reality somewhat. The weird feelings I was experiencing made me open my eyes and look down at the bathwater. I stared in shock as I realised the entire bath was now red with blood. My vision was beginning to blur and I felt that there must be too much steam in the room. I peered up all around me and could see it dancing, I could hear it. The smokey silhouettes of steam began to resemble faces, once of them opened its mouth wide and flew at me, prompting me to jump out of the bath and leap for the door. I needed to find something to put over my leg and stop the bleeding. I searched and limped and panicked as I wondered where the bandages would be kept, I couldn't think straight and I could not remember.  
The steam was chasing me now. I could see the faces shooting out like coloured wraiths from the bathroom entrance. I struggled over the chairs in my living room as one of the wraiths flew at me and knocked over a glass bowl above the fireplace. I rolled over the coffee table and felt the last of my energies subside. I closed my eyes for the last time as I passed out, laying naked on my back over the furniture. The sound of the wraith's magic and moaning filled my ears as I lost consciousness. I was headed for another world now, a world I once knew and experienced all too closely.

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_And that is the conclusion of the first chapter. The next one will be up whenever I find time to write it. Feel free to send me reviews!_


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